I’m still learning my way around blogville and thought I had three blogs with release dates. This one is 5 months old.
Five months old.
I was busy with the Salem Saturday Market and it was a blast! If you’re local, come join us in April when it starts up again. Apparently I was too busy to keep up with custom orders, Saturday Salem Market and life and blogging went to the back burner.
But hey, we’re heading into the holidays and so it all works out perfectly.
Holidays = eating and human connection. Family and friends gather and break bread once or twice a year and we’re getting closer.
This blog post has no jewelry. I’m not here to sell anything, or teach anything 🙂
Here it is, the blog post that I *thought* was already posted. Better late than never, I suppose!
Have you ever just sat and had eye contact with someone? No conversation, just looking at each other.
Try it for one minute this week. It’s wonderful. Create a connection.
This video keeps popping up on my facebook feed about human connection in a busy city. A man, dressed nicely, sits at a small 4×4 table covered with a black table cloth and just waits with calmly folded hands for someone to come and sit across from him.
A young woman, sitting cross legged, in the same square (I am not 100% sure) and she waits for people to come and sit in front of her.
Long story short…they created this opportunity to be available for human connection. For one minute, you just simply sit and look into the persons eyes.
Some people can’t handle it. Some people are dying for it. Some people don’t know they’re missing it until someone just stares them in the eye for a minute, gives them that space to …just be…and connect.
It creates an emotion so strong one man just nods at the end. It was like he was saying this life affirming “Ah, yes, yes…that’s the connection.” Another woman has tears rolling down her face. Their faces, to me, say “I’ve been searching for this and didn’t even know it.”
My title “People are hungry for real” isn’t missing a comma. It’s not part of the language we use today ..you know…”like, for reals mom, I’m late because I missed the bus.”
No, not that “for real”
I mean people are hungry for genuine, for something …real.
I met …gosh, I don’t know how many people passed by my booth today at the Saturday Salem Market. Some were eating their sno-cones and carrying their weekly fruits and veggies.
And to each of them I said “Good Morning, good morning!!!” (because I like the fun way it sounds) and it’s just my way of saying “Hi there, thanks for coming.” It’s not a gimmick to get them to come in to my booth. It’s creating human connection. I enjoy it, they enjoy it. It made some people squirm because they thought they were being manipulated into buying something. (but that’s another blog post!)
One time I heard a story when I was learning to be a counselor. This man jumped from the San Francisco Golden Gate Bridge and killed himself… and when they identified him later, they found a note that read something along the lines of “I’m going to jump off the Bridge. If you find this note, it’s because I walked all the way to the bridge and not one person smiled at me.”
I don’t know if it’s true, but it stuck with me. It made me want to create a wave of connection with people. From my heart. To yours. Then you would create the wave with others…then maybe one day my smile will come back to me through the eyes of a stranger 🙂 You never know!
People. Are. Starving. For. Real. Genuine. Human. Connection.
That’s the problem. Okay, so it’s not the “only” problem…but it’s part of the problem.
Since the problem is they’re starving, then the solution is feeding them.
What do you feed starving people?
Just the act of saying “Good Morning, good morning” creates a human connection. I have the hardest time talking to people sometimes and it slides away when I think…”maybe this person does too!” and I crawl out of my comfort zone and say “hello” in the most authentic way I can. Fun and zippy. Sounds corny but it works for me.
Because if it’s not fun, then I’m not doing it.
A lady, a veteran of the U.S. Navy, came to my booth simply because I said “Good Morning, Good Morning” and I saw her tattoo. It said ”
there is something you must always remember. you are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think”
I asked her about the tattoo and in conversation, it came out that she was a veteran. A big smile crossed my face and I walked towards her and while I’m walking towards her I said “Is it okay if I give you a hug?”
Surprised the hell out of her.
I told her I have a special place in my heart for veterans and thanked her for her service.
She didn’t buy anything, that’s not why I did it. It wasn’t an emotional manipulation. And the next time I see her, I’m going to call her my favorite veteran. Because she is. (shhh I tell them all that!)
She might get dozens of hugs a day or live with 100 people who tell her they love her, appreciate her and sing her songs of adoration.
Or that might be the only human connection, the only hug, the only “good morning, good morning” (as in “hey there, I see you and you matter enough for me to simply say “HI”) she got all day…or all week.
I wish I had some really cool blog worthy love thy neighbor words of wisdom but this is the best I have!
I hope, as we head into the holiday season…that you create a human connection. Invite the new neighbor to Thanksgiving dinner, take a plate to the homeless guy that you know is mentally ill. Take some socks and tampons to a homeless shelter (the two least donated things, I didn’t know!) The kid on the corner who lives in a triplex. Her mom works 3 jobs and you know they don’t have much. Give. Not just gifties, those are nice too…but give a human connection. Small ones, big ones…it doesn’t matter.
Because I truly believe it all comes back to us.
And if giving love isn’t enough…
Then double the dose.
And if you’re the one hungry for connections, then be brave like I am every Saturday at the market, start saying “good morning” or “hey, howyadoin!” (say it really fast, it’s fun!) and just reach out. It’s good practice and you never know whose life you’ll touch.
At the end of the day, we’re all responsible for filling our own cups. And some days we need more than others. Some days it helps to give more than others.
I’m not religious, but this is one of my favorite things to hear and read…
St. Francis of Assisi…
“Lord, make me an instrument of thy peace.
Where there is hatred, let me sow love,
Where there is injury, pardon;
Where there is doubt, faith;
Where there is despair, hope;
Where there is darkness, light;
And where there is sadness, joy.
O Divine Master, grant that I may not so much seek
to be consoled as to console,
to be understood as to understand,
to be loved, as to love.
For it is in giving that we receive,
It is in pardoning that we are pardoned,
and it is in dying that we are born to eternal life.”
Hope you have fun traveling and making human connections. I’d love to hear the bravest thing you said and did in being genuine and real.
I hope you have an amazing and wonderful holiday season. I hope you have enough to eat, enough shelter, enough clothes on your back, enough hugs and enough love.
You are enough